ISleepInADrawer.com

The Temporary Replacement

One day in late summer, the best pair of headphones I ever possessed broke. We'd had a long run together... since high school. But I had to let go and move on.

In such circumstances, most people would say, "Oh well. Time to go buy new headphones. I can't live without my music, after all."

Me: "Oh well. Time to find some temporary replacement headphones; because there's no bloody way I'm going to get off my ass right now and go buy some new ones. I can't live without my music, after all."

Meet temporary replacement: Game Boy Earphones. We're talkin' earphones from the original Game Boy here, people. Before color. Before new sleek design. Before smaller fits-in-your-pocket craze. The earphones had an unbelieveably short cord [Think about it: what good is a long cord when the graphics are so poor that you have to hold the Game Boy so close to your face anyway?]. Each earphone had a stripe (red for right; blue for left) to indicate which ear it "belonged" in. [Shockingly, when you reverse them, you can still hear just fine!... But, most of the time, Anal Rententive Jamesisms took hold and I segregated red to the right, blue to the left.] No sleek, curved design [no late-late-twentieth-century-or-early-twenty-first-century "nowism"]. Just sharp corners [not-so-late-twentieth-century "futurism"] - with an embarrassingly-short cord; I could barely put my portable CD player in my hoodie front pocket.

As you read previously, the Best Pair of Headphones died at midday on a sunny day in late summer. Game Boy Earphones were a Temporary Replacement. I always inteded to replace the Best Pair of Headphones; hell, I've been to stores that sell plenty of Son/Daughter/Androgynous-Offspring of the Best Pair of Headphones. But, I always thought, "I'll do that later..."

So, here I sit in winter... thinking, "Sure, they look awkward. But no one will ever notice... and if they do, they won't say anything."

Last night on the bus, I sat calmly, alone, listening to the best movie soundtrack ever [William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet]. An early-thirtysomething, heavyset, leather-clad bear two rows in front of me suddenly turn in my direction, pointed at my reddening ears, and yelled, "Hey! GAME BOY EARPHONES!!!!!!"

I've been had.

Every twentysomething and thirtysomething on the bus turned my direction, most churning up happy memories of original Game Boy, and wondering what the hell I was doing with those not-so-user-friendly-and-not-so-fashionable earphones.

This wouldn't seem so ridiculous if it weren't for the fact that the "warm midday in late summer" was actually a warm midday summer two-and-a-half years ago.

Posted by James at December 19, 2003 12:34 PM