7:00AM – Alarm goes off.
7:15AM – I finally stir from bed and prepare to shower.
Zach – “Turn on the radio.”
Me – “Huh?”
Zach – “I wanna listen to NPR.”
Me – “Oh, okay.” [I turn on NPR and go shower, dress, and take part in a futile beautification ritual I’ve spent 23 years "perfecting".]
And coming back from the shower, I’m greeted not with Bob Edwards reading the latest international news… but with a train whistle on my radio accompanied by a "human interest" story involving old railway lines in some who-gives-a-sh*t town.
Me – “Did you change the station?”
Zach – “Nope. This is still Morning Edition, NPR…”
Me – “When did Morning Edition start to sound like the 'Rock Island Lines'?”
Zach – “Since they fired Bob Edwards.”
Me – “They sacked Bob Edwards?!”
Zach – “Well, forced him into retirement, I think. This is the ‘new’ NPR.”
Me – “What… an NPR without NEWS?!”
Zach – “Yeah. At least for this hour of Morning Edition… No news at all. Like the Today Show has become.”
Oh Lord. It’s spreading. First the Today Show, then CNN, then Headline News, and now at least an hour-long segment of NPR’s Morning Edition. Within a decade, there probably won’t be one ounce of the American media that actually delivers NEWS. The headlines won’t be about world events, climate change, and terrorism. They’ll be “A Special Report: the Courageous Fight to Teach the Value of Vitamin C in Public Schools of the Upper Mississippi Valley in the 1930s”, “Post-It Notes: the Untold Drama Engulfing a Fifth Grade Class in Shawnee, Oklahoma”, and “No. 2 Pencils: What Every Parent Needs to Know to Keep His or Her Child Safe”.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is what plagues American society today. No news. Just useless soundbytes, coffee cups, plush couches, "human interest" stories, and Katie Couric’s laughter labelled as “real news programming you can count on”. Give me Bob Edwards any day.
Posted by James at May 11, 2004 09:57 AMWow. I was doing a search just to see how many websites would contain the word "Mammaw" because I've always wondered why we use that word while other parts of the country don't. Anyway . . . here comes this online journal by a really cool guy who lives where I lived for 3 years in the late nineties into the 21st century. I've not read your whole site of course but so far I've not found one single issue we disagree on. You're a hoot, James! So there. Take that!