There are a number of factors to explain why I, in the many years of my public school education, have, at least a vast majority of the time, often felt socially awkward - almost a complete outsider. Sometimes, only the common experiences of calculus exams and music concerts would bind me to them. The fault - if fault must be pressed - likely lies with me. At the core, I'm shy and, as a result, socially awkward. There's also a significant nerdiness factor, of course... How many kids once aspired to be a cartographer or meteorologist, after all? The fact that I'm gay also comes into play. Back then, I was a bit more cautious. I feared the trouble that would come to me and my immediate family; I feared, in general, "stirring the sh*t."
I wasn't comfortable with myself. I didn't begin to be until the latter half of high school, and on into college.
But, tonight, I came upon the real reason: the real reason why I never "fit in" in school. Why I, up until my late teens, felt like I didn't understand my peers, and why they didn't understand me...
I did, do, and likely always will hate The Real World!
Posted by James at December 17, 2006 06:41 PM